i set up an office in my living room
yes, a mini portable office
i was feeling pretty mixed up on that
should i be happy so i don't have to go back realllyyyyy late everyday?
or just be really unhappy because i don't get to do my favorite activities on sundays (read sleep eat sleep)
but today
i do feel good
because i get to go back earlier
and spend quality time with the family
so..smiles
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Sunday, March 29, 2009
It was 8.25pm and everybody at my house seemed excited. Apparently, they have been talking about Earth hour for several days. Ok fine, I’m bad. I thought they would not care but they did. Which is actually a good thing after all. And now the Earth hour is effectively over and I’m typing this piece with the light on.
It’s not much. An hour will not do much. It does not even make up for all the rubbishes, wasted power and those thing that I’ve been littering all my life but I do believe that we should start by starting. I do think it’s more like a hype, similar like the organic hype. Ya, I know, I do think that way but I’m so whatever right?
Had great fun at the party at Cassie’s sis. Great food, great stuff. Great activity. I’m covered in soot, stank of smoke but whatever. I’m just happy. And Kate, the birthday boy loved our presents.
Ok I’m positively pissed about this connection. I have been trying to connect since 9 and just finished an hour conversation when it finally connected. But now I'm just tired and pissed. Urgh
It’s not much. An hour will not do much. It does not even make up for all the rubbishes, wasted power and those thing that I’ve been littering all my life but I do believe that we should start by starting. I do think it’s more like a hype, similar like the organic hype. Ya, I know, I do think that way but I’m so whatever right?
Had great fun at the party at Cassie’s sis. Great food, great stuff. Great activity. I’m covered in soot, stank of smoke but whatever. I’m just happy. And Kate, the birthday boy loved our presents.
Ok I’m positively pissed about this connection. I have been trying to connect since 9 and just finished an hour conversation when it finally connected. But now I'm just tired and pissed. Urgh
Thursday, March 19, 2009
took this from mak hayam terlampau's (yang hot dan seksi). time to learn about myself.
Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.
(i wish la kan? i can't even solve this problem that i'm having now)
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.
(anything as in anything? that does not sound good)
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.
(and i'm predicting that will not happen in the coming ten years)
The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.
(and why am i dating girls then?)
Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.
(i shudder to think about my pointer though. i prefer practical stuff)
The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
(and i wonder do they have an opening as time-waster?)
How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.
(urm hum. ok this sounds a bit true)
What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.
(wow. so, can i just wear kain batik and T-shirt bodo to office now?)
Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.
(mature? yah, i know. i wish la)
ni sape create kuiz ni? tah sape-sape punye analisis la yang aku dpt ni.
takpela. hiburan waktu tgh hari what
Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.
(i wish la kan? i can't even solve this problem that i'm having now)
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.
(anything as in anything? that does not sound good)
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.
(and i'm predicting that will not happen in the coming ten years)
The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.
(and why am i dating girls then?)
Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.
(i shudder to think about my pointer though. i prefer practical stuff)
The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
(and i wonder do they have an opening as time-waster?)
How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.
(urm hum. ok this sounds a bit true)
What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.
(wow. so, can i just wear kain batik and T-shirt bodo to office now?)
Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.
(mature? yah, i know. i wish la)
ni sape create kuiz ni? tah sape-sape punye analisis la yang aku dpt ni.
takpela. hiburan waktu tgh hari what
Monday, March 16, 2009
It never crossed my mind that a movie with Owen Wilson in it will be sad. Seriously.
This is a movie about life, married life in fact. John (Owen Wilson) and Jen (Jennifer Aniston) started their life during a blizzard and both proceeded to work their marriage together. First, Wilson secured a job as a small time-reporter before proceeding to write a column. They got a puppy which they dubbed as 'clearance puppy' and from there on, the story unfold.
Marley, a Labrador, was continuously called as the worst dog in the world ever. But still, the family love them. He was there during the miscarriage, first son, second son and the 'whoops' daughter. It was there when Sebastian (Eric Dane *drools)tried to score chicks and of course, when the neighbour got stabbed.
It's drama, not much of funny lines but enough dosage to make people laugh. Especially Grogan's boss. It's like a walking irony.
Despite the fear for thunder, hyperactivity, naughtiness and all, the family learnt how to stick together and survive it all with the dog. And I can't believe that I actually cried when they buried Marley (OK fine I cried. The first movie that made me cry was I Am Sam. Luckily I watched it alone or someone would have called me a wet blanket. Wait, I think that person did call me that).
There were fights, colicky and disagreements. The food has to be put on the table but there is actually more to life. And one will never know where the inspiration might come from. Despite that, it is very very important to keep the eyes open and ready to accept the signs.
Thus, I'm taking this opportunity to everyone that has shared their thoughts on my previous blog entry, as well as those who read it. Reading the comments helped, I kid you not. And especially to Carrie who spent a totally cool evening yesterday (don't make me hate you for reviewing Mills and Boons novels. You just want to annoy the hell out of me right?). And Meg Cabot helps (although it made me puke all night yesterday because I was reading it on the train and maybe something is wrong in the Tom Yam Noodle. Whatever, I survived the night). But why don't MPH Subang Parade sell other Cabot's books? It's a crime not to sell other titles.
OK, enough babbling. Got to do Queen of Babble thingy with a good friend.
This is a movie about life, married life in fact. John (Owen Wilson) and Jen (Jennifer Aniston) started their life during a blizzard and both proceeded to work their marriage together. First, Wilson secured a job as a small time-reporter before proceeding to write a column. They got a puppy which they dubbed as 'clearance puppy' and from there on, the story unfold.
Marley, a Labrador, was continuously called as the worst dog in the world ever. But still, the family love them. He was there during the miscarriage, first son, second son and the 'whoops' daughter. It was there when Sebastian (Eric Dane *drools)tried to score chicks and of course, when the neighbour got stabbed.
It's drama, not much of funny lines but enough dosage to make people laugh. Especially Grogan's boss. It's like a walking irony.
Despite the fear for thunder, hyperactivity, naughtiness and all, the family learnt how to stick together and survive it all with the dog. And I can't believe that I actually cried when they buried Marley (OK fine I cried. The first movie that made me cry was I Am Sam. Luckily I watched it alone or someone would have called me a wet blanket. Wait, I think that person did call me that).
There were fights, colicky and disagreements. The food has to be put on the table but there is actually more to life. And one will never know where the inspiration might come from. Despite that, it is very very important to keep the eyes open and ready to accept the signs.
Thus, I'm taking this opportunity to everyone that has shared their thoughts on my previous blog entry, as well as those who read it. Reading the comments helped, I kid you not. And especially to Carrie who spent a totally cool evening yesterday (don't make me hate you for reviewing Mills and Boons novels. You just want to annoy the hell out of me right?). And Meg Cabot helps (although it made me puke all night yesterday because I was reading it on the train and maybe something is wrong in the Tom Yam Noodle. Whatever, I survived the night). But why don't MPH Subang Parade sell other Cabot's books? It's a crime not to sell other titles.
OK, enough babbling. Got to do Queen of Babble thingy with a good friend.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Midlife crisis can occur at any time of the year and the period it lasts ranges from one person to another. I for one, is having trouble coping with it.
Cited from wikipedia: "Midlife crisis is a term used in Western societies to describe a period of dramatic self-doubt that is felt by some individuals in the "middle years" of life, as a result of sensing the passing of youth and the imminence of old age."
I'm having doubt and a lot of thinking. Its as if my whole being and energy are being invested at the workplace. Quality family time becomes less and less, I smile less frequently at the office and many things do not excite me anymore. I realize I had too many books, clothes, opportunities to laugh but still I sigh. I'm just tired and sore. I just need time to sit down, type the stories I have in my head here and be happy. Unfortunately, that is not going to happen soon. My time, my life, me have to be constantly divided for different things that I just want to scream 'STOP!' and let the passing time freeze.
Keep on dreaming baybeh.
I know I know, the work pays the bill. But that's it, where does it go from there? I'm having doubts, serious doubts about me now. I don't see me moving forward, instead, I'm progressing backwards, thinking about working in bookstores and stuff. Like a friend nicely put, 'You've lost the drive' (or something along the line. I was too busy rearranging excuses to skip work today in my head than hear the friend speak).
I am thinking about moving to Penang. To leave everything behind and skip this all. What this hollow feeling didn't tell really is whether I will miss my friends; who stood thick and thin. This thought doesn't fell like a phase. I'm actually looking, judging, drawing the pros and cons of the choices. I'm just tired.
What is the point of rushing when there's more to life? Why do we have to run after buses, taxis, trains and LRTs when we know the job will always will be piled high on the table? Why do we thrive to buy the most expensive bags, shoes and shirts when at the end of the day, they will just wither away?
I lost the competitiveness, the drive, the will to creep out of this deep, plunging, sinking feeling. I know something is not right but I can't place it (no, it's not getting a boyfriend or a partner. I'll be whining and complaining and being demanding that getting into a relationship will be an absolute disaster). I know something is missing; it's not my toe, my finger or my nose but I don't know what it is.
I spend most of the time trying to escape from this feeling. I went out nearly daily, hang out with different but same circle of friends, watch movies after movies and turn pages after pages of books but still, the serious self-doubt will not leave me alone. It drives me mad because I fell helpless, not knowing to do anything. No matter how hard I told my life to get back on track, it just wouldn't. Ouh right, I was the one who is supposed to do that.
I'm trying to find meaning not to run away from this place, this job. I'm raking my brain, just trying to hold on to it. Maybe I do seriously need a break. Switch the phone off and run off somewhere without electrical appliances.I am just frigging-effing-tired.
I don't know how long this will go on but please, if anyone, any of you know the cure for this crisis, I would love to hear it.
P/S: if i can just find time to type the story that I so wanted to type since last year, it would really be a great help.
Cited from wikipedia: "Midlife crisis is a term used in Western societies to describe a period of dramatic self-doubt that is felt by some individuals in the "middle years" of life, as a result of sensing the passing of youth and the imminence of old age."
I'm having doubt and a lot of thinking. Its as if my whole being and energy are being invested at the workplace. Quality family time becomes less and less, I smile less frequently at the office and many things do not excite me anymore. I realize I had too many books, clothes, opportunities to laugh but still I sigh. I'm just tired and sore. I just need time to sit down, type the stories I have in my head here and be happy. Unfortunately, that is not going to happen soon. My time, my life, me have to be constantly divided for different things that I just want to scream 'STOP!' and let the passing time freeze.
Keep on dreaming baybeh.
I know I know, the work pays the bill. But that's it, where does it go from there? I'm having doubts, serious doubts about me now. I don't see me moving forward, instead, I'm progressing backwards, thinking about working in bookstores and stuff. Like a friend nicely put, 'You've lost the drive' (or something along the line. I was too busy rearranging excuses to skip work today in my head than hear the friend speak).
I am thinking about moving to Penang. To leave everything behind and skip this all. What this hollow feeling didn't tell really is whether I will miss my friends; who stood thick and thin. This thought doesn't fell like a phase. I'm actually looking, judging, drawing the pros and cons of the choices. I'm just tired.
What is the point of rushing when there's more to life? Why do we have to run after buses, taxis, trains and LRTs when we know the job will always will be piled high on the table? Why do we thrive to buy the most expensive bags, shoes and shirts when at the end of the day, they will just wither away?
I lost the competitiveness, the drive, the will to creep out of this deep, plunging, sinking feeling. I know something is not right but I can't place it (no, it's not getting a boyfriend or a partner. I'll be whining and complaining and being demanding that getting into a relationship will be an absolute disaster). I know something is missing; it's not my toe, my finger or my nose but I don't know what it is.
I spend most of the time trying to escape from this feeling. I went out nearly daily, hang out with different but same circle of friends, watch movies after movies and turn pages after pages of books but still, the serious self-doubt will not leave me alone. It drives me mad because I fell helpless, not knowing to do anything. No matter how hard I told my life to get back on track, it just wouldn't. Ouh right, I was the one who is supposed to do that.
I'm trying to find meaning not to run away from this place, this job. I'm raking my brain, just trying to hold on to it. Maybe I do seriously need a break. Switch the phone off and run off somewhere without electrical appliances.I am just frigging-effing-tired.
I don't know how long this will go on but please, if anyone, any of you know the cure for this crisis, I would love to hear it.
P/S: if i can just find time to type the story that I so wanted to type since last year, it would really be a great help.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
wednesday, 11 March 2009
A: so, the town that you lived in, was it an industrial town?
B: yes, it was
A: was daimler-chrysler based in your town
B: no, but audi is. our town is called 'bandar planet' for other towns. you know right?
I put a totally blank face
B: ouh, you didn't learn it before?
A: omg, you make me feel like a bimbo
(whines for half a minute)
A: wait, you mean bandar satelit not bandar planet right?
B laughed enthusiastically. B actually had the audacity to tell me that I didn't actually learn about it. helloooo...it's geography of course i studied it before.
but that didn't stop me laughing. it just slipped out of my mouth. i didn't intend to laugh at B like that but bandar planet? what? that is like so frigging alien.
darn it. i have to go back. i'm like so effing sleepy. got to go back and continue john tucker must die
A: so, the town that you lived in, was it an industrial town?
B: yes, it was
A: was daimler-chrysler based in your town
B: no, but audi is. our town is called 'bandar planet' for other towns. you know right?
I put a totally blank face
B: ouh, you didn't learn it before?
A: omg, you make me feel like a bimbo
(whines for half a minute)
A: wait, you mean bandar satelit not bandar planet right?
B laughed enthusiastically. B actually had the audacity to tell me that I didn't actually learn about it. helloooo...it's geography of course i studied it before.
but that didn't stop me laughing. it just slipped out of my mouth. i didn't intend to laugh at B like that but bandar planet? what? that is like so frigging alien.
darn it. i have to go back. i'm like so effing sleepy. got to go back and continue john tucker must die
Thursday, March 05, 2009
i actually typed something based on the change of the headline but no, it didn't come out. maybe it was a sign from god not to hate John Tucker. will i follow it? you wish and keep on wishing. i hate john tucker like i hate my mobile phone during work. yes, a love hate relationship.
so, it's settled that:
Zill will now be known as Carrie, the brainy-blonde
Azu-rin will be Kate, the new hot girl
while I am Heather.
Well Zill @ Casey wanted to be Beth (Sophia Bush) but in the end nobody got the chance to be one because it's useless to fight.
and this will be one of the silly things we do. who's john tucker? well..it's for the three of us to keep a secret and no one will find out.
Carrie, I didn't manage to smile to anyone yesterday. People looked at the wall instead of looking at me.
On another development:
I pissed somebody off I think. I was the one who was pissed off at first but it ended up being him who got pissed off. Weird huh?
But I'm still pissed. Hate is a very strong word. Let's make it fun and never find a word for this tiny, blinding, flash of hot anger near the heart. Deal?
so, it's settled that:
Zill will now be known as Carrie, the brainy-blonde
Azu-rin will be Kate, the new hot girl
while I am Heather.
Well Zill @ Casey wanted to be Beth (Sophia Bush) but in the end nobody got the chance to be one because it's useless to fight.
and this will be one of the silly things we do. who's john tucker? well..it's for the three of us to keep a secret and no one will find out.
Carrie, I didn't manage to smile to anyone yesterday. People looked at the wall instead of looking at me.
On another development:
I pissed somebody off I think. I was the one who was pissed off at first but it ended up being him who got pissed off. Weird huh?
But I'm still pissed. Hate is a very strong word. Let's make it fun and never find a word for this tiny, blinding, flash of hot anger near the heart. Deal?
Tuesday, March 03, 2009
i'm smiling and still smiling. afterall, i had the best companions with me who will always always support me, regardless whatever may befall on me. i'm so very glad that i meet them.
through laughter and tears, through thick and thin.
wah, berfilosofi gitoo. akak ni kenape kak? dah buang tebiat eh?
jawapan: akak under influence ubat batuk. bukan beli punye okeh? doktor kasik
i'm still coughing and its going to be 2 weeks tomorrow. i secretly think that i'm allergic to smoke as in cigarette smoke. someone alleged that i lied when i accompanied that person for a cigarette break. hey, i was ok five years ago. how was i to know i suddenly developed this allergy? ok maybe i was allergic to all the memories. there's a lot of maybes and i can go on and on and on about it. maybes that are particularly linked to the thing that happened five years ago.
another note: i have Casey in my life. the casey as in 27 Dresses Casey who will slap me back to reality. the Casey who is practical, down-to-earth, thoughtful, funny, caring, realistic and ever resourceful casey. of course, the name will be zill but she slapped me back to reality that i have the urge to call her casey starting yesterday. i mean, she 'slapped' me, not quite literally.
and we settled on the part where this is a lesson to make me a much better person. to practise patience as well as all the things that we learnt through the alchemist. so far so good. i don't really think the self-destructing period will be so much needed.
and i have a new mission, thanks to Casey. the new mission is smile. be nice and smile. be approachable and smile. Casey said smile to everyone. well, i only have the capacity to be nice to at most five person per day (i expect Casey to comment on this. wheee!) maybe not five. omg, i never realise that smiling is a chore. at this point yes, i realise that smiling is not easy for me. like a friend said, org mesia mmg tak peramah melainkan dengan org luar je. darn it, i'm not even nice to foreigners *cries.
ah, lunch break is over in a few minutes. got to make the trip upstairs (and hopes that someone will...nevermind). am looking forward to meet Casey today. Mrs Bloomwood tomorrow and dear girlfriend on Thurs. wow. bilenye ko nak beli tiket pegi penang ni? ishk
through laughter and tears, through thick and thin.
wah, berfilosofi gitoo. akak ni kenape kak? dah buang tebiat eh?
jawapan: akak under influence ubat batuk. bukan beli punye okeh? doktor kasik
i'm still coughing and its going to be 2 weeks tomorrow. i secretly think that i'm allergic to smoke as in cigarette smoke. someone alleged that i lied when i accompanied that person for a cigarette break. hey, i was ok five years ago. how was i to know i suddenly developed this allergy? ok maybe i was allergic to all the memories. there's a lot of maybes and i can go on and on and on about it. maybes that are particularly linked to the thing that happened five years ago.
another note: i have Casey in my life. the casey as in 27 Dresses Casey who will slap me back to reality. the Casey who is practical, down-to-earth, thoughtful, funny, caring, realistic and ever resourceful casey. of course, the name will be zill but she slapped me back to reality that i have the urge to call her casey starting yesterday. i mean, she 'slapped' me, not quite literally.
and we settled on the part where this is a lesson to make me a much better person. to practise patience as well as all the things that we learnt through the alchemist. so far so good. i don't really think the self-destructing period will be so much needed.
and i have a new mission, thanks to Casey. the new mission is smile. be nice and smile. be approachable and smile. Casey said smile to everyone. well, i only have the capacity to be nice to at most five person per day (i expect Casey to comment on this. wheee!) maybe not five. omg, i never realise that smiling is a chore. at this point yes, i realise that smiling is not easy for me. like a friend said, org mesia mmg tak peramah melainkan dengan org luar je. darn it, i'm not even nice to foreigners *cries.
ah, lunch break is over in a few minutes. got to make the trip upstairs (and hopes that someone will...nevermind). am looking forward to meet Casey today. Mrs Bloomwood tomorrow and dear girlfriend on Thurs. wow. bilenye ko nak beli tiket pegi penang ni? ishk
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
waktu: 6.40 pagi
tempat kejadian: dapur umah sendiri
atok: ko cukup rehat ke
saya: cukup *gosok-gosok mate. baru bangun la katekan
atok: ko balik pukol 11, bangun pukul 6 pg
saya masih terpisat-pisat
atok: ada tempat rehat ke kat sana? cukup ke rehat
ok fineeeeeeeeeeeeeee. i get it. i tak dating dah pasneh
tempat kejadian: dapur umah sendiri
atok: ko cukup rehat ke
saya: cukup *gosok-gosok mate. baru bangun la katekan
atok: ko balik pukol 11, bangun pukul 6 pg
saya masih terpisat-pisat
atok: ada tempat rehat ke kat sana? cukup ke rehat
ok fineeeeeeeeeeeeeee. i get it. i tak dating dah pasneh
Monday, February 23, 2009
this is the part when i'm lost for words
when i'm not feeling it
the word flows like a river
but this time around
i am at lost
mr A-Z, can you lend me your wordplay?
ok, obviously merepek
21 February 2009
i marked it on the calendar and was even giddy to the thought of waking up to see the two wackiest babes
ha-di ha
it was in fact the best day for last week
(seriously azu-rin, i know you are reading this. dating padalecki is not even close compared to hanging out with you guys)
we did go climbing the mountainous MMU
i can't believe it was so different now
and we took some pictures because we apparently were not as 'gila' as we used to be
if not, we will be taking tonnes of pictures
there were 'memutar kenangan' moments sambil makan fish and chip yang agak best but not quite there yet
and looking at the sakura in front of the library is bliss
well not really sakura but what the heck.
and we turned alamanda into hyde park for 5 mins
hyde park la sangat
tajam ooo rumput die
sebelum tu bertemu konsep bali (siries aku mcm tokleh tahan ok tang ni. tapi terlampau sensitip dan mampu menyebabkan pembunuhan jika diterangkan di sini)
i just want to say thank you so much to azu-rin and zill
you made my day
for the whole week at least
azu-rin for the 'konsep bali' and zila for the medicine
you should submit the suggestion to include that minuman kulit rambutan dalam fear factor
bole kite menang sesame
ok i broke my back sitting on this chair (bukan brokeback mountain)
and thus, i would like to say tata
mood: putar kenangan mode. the 'other' kenangan obviously *blushes
when i'm not feeling it
the word flows like a river
but this time around
i am at lost
mr A-Z, can you lend me your wordplay?
ok, obviously merepek
21 February 2009
i marked it on the calendar and was even giddy to the thought of waking up to see the two wackiest babes
ha-di ha
it was in fact the best day for last week
(seriously azu-rin, i know you are reading this. dating padalecki is not even close compared to hanging out with you guys)
we did go climbing the mountainous MMU
i can't believe it was so different now
and we took some pictures because we apparently were not as 'gila' as we used to be
if not, we will be taking tonnes of pictures
there were 'memutar kenangan' moments sambil makan fish and chip yang agak best but not quite there yet
and looking at the sakura in front of the library is bliss
well not really sakura but what the heck.
and we turned alamanda into hyde park for 5 mins
hyde park la sangat
tajam ooo rumput die
sebelum tu bertemu konsep bali (siries aku mcm tokleh tahan ok tang ni. tapi terlampau sensitip dan mampu menyebabkan pembunuhan jika diterangkan di sini)
i just want to say thank you so much to azu-rin and zill
you made my day
for the whole week at least
azu-rin for the 'konsep bali' and zila for the medicine
you should submit the suggestion to include that minuman kulit rambutan dalam fear factor
bole kite menang sesame
ok i broke my back sitting on this chair (bukan brokeback mountain)
and thus, i would like to say tata
mood: putar kenangan mode. the 'other' kenangan obviously *blushes
Thursday, February 19, 2009
It's noon and I'm still massaging my pounding headache over the hangover that was never there. With two tall glass of Nescafe. And I do think that I need another one.
The past few weeks have been like a roller-coaster journey. Discovering someone who is so similar and so alike was both unnerving and exciting, dizzying and fun. Despite the fact that we started on an extremely rocky boat, we managed to pull it off nicely. Sufficient to say that I've never had this much fun for an extremely long time.
I first thought it was just me that managed to get along with a friend really well. And then things started to unfold and I realized that we are alike. Not in terms of having many things in common but we have the same habit, we believe in the same philosophy and we like talking about facts. Put aside the love for books, music and movies, it's not difficult to enjoy yourself when you are with your twin. Ouh yes, I think I've found my twin. Which is great, despite the random scariness it bring once in a while.
It's also good to know that the other party was having fun. The biggest compliment will be 'you are fun to be with'. Believe me friend, the feeling is mutual.
But I do think fun is good in small doses. I feel drained right now and God knows why when I need all the energy I can muster in a day. Of course I crave for fun but too much of something is never good. We tend to lose track of time when we start opening our mouths and that can seriously lead to late nights, which is equivalent to disaster.
I think I need to take charge of my life right now. I know this feels good and it's good to feel good (ok, I'm talking in riddles) but I think I have to put a brake somewhere. God, give me strength to resist touching my phone at 5pm. I can resist everything except temptation (Oscar Wilde).
I'm tired, I feel drained and I can't stop coughing. Which is so totally uncool.
Crap, I have to check if I've passed my virus to my twin.
The past few weeks have been like a roller-coaster journey. Discovering someone who is so similar and so alike was both unnerving and exciting, dizzying and fun. Despite the fact that we started on an extremely rocky boat, we managed to pull it off nicely. Sufficient to say that I've never had this much fun for an extremely long time.
I first thought it was just me that managed to get along with a friend really well. And then things started to unfold and I realized that we are alike. Not in terms of having many things in common but we have the same habit, we believe in the same philosophy and we like talking about facts. Put aside the love for books, music and movies, it's not difficult to enjoy yourself when you are with your twin. Ouh yes, I think I've found my twin. Which is great, despite the random scariness it bring once in a while.
It's also good to know that the other party was having fun. The biggest compliment will be 'you are fun to be with'. Believe me friend, the feeling is mutual.
But I do think fun is good in small doses. I feel drained right now and God knows why when I need all the energy I can muster in a day. Of course I crave for fun but too much of something is never good. We tend to lose track of time when we start opening our mouths and that can seriously lead to late nights, which is equivalent to disaster.
I think I need to take charge of my life right now. I know this feels good and it's good to feel good (ok, I'm talking in riddles) but I think I have to put a brake somewhere. God, give me strength to resist touching my phone at 5pm. I can resist everything except temptation (Oscar Wilde).
I'm tired, I feel drained and I can't stop coughing. Which is so totally uncool.
Crap, I have to check if I've passed my virus to my twin.
Monday, February 16, 2009
my body is sore, from the waist down. but not to the point of having to apply for MC, thank God. must be from the excessive sitting while watching fishes in the aquarium yesterday. we sat there doing nothing but looked at all the different species swimming, to the point i feel like nodding off. but luckily it didn't happen.
it's actually very unnerving to meet another you who has the same thoughts, wishes and dreams. seriously. i never thought it will happen or i will meet the other twin but it actually happened. the more i got to know this friend, the more i tend to be surprised. a joke that turned out to be too real.
i have no idea whether it is a blessing or something that i should be worried upon.
Ok, monday has just come to an end (in terms of office hours). i'm having sore throat and my feet are like leads. need to go back ASAP because i don't trust my legs anymore
it's actually very unnerving to meet another you who has the same thoughts, wishes and dreams. seriously. i never thought it will happen or i will meet the other twin but it actually happened. the more i got to know this friend, the more i tend to be surprised. a joke that turned out to be too real.
i have no idea whether it is a blessing or something that i should be worried upon.
Ok, monday has just come to an end (in terms of office hours). i'm having sore throat and my feet are like leads. need to go back ASAP because i don't trust my legs anymore
Thursday, February 12, 2009
i hate ships, vessel, ship building, conversion, chartering. but not really. darn it. love-hate relationship di tengahari yang kames.
it's either i have been awfully busy or awfully lazy to type something this whole time. i don't know which but it doesn't matter. life's good, missing SOPOP like nobody's business. I haven't seen Zill for two weeks and it feels like losing an arm. And I haven't talked to si comel yg mempunyai toshi for like two weeks and i'm losing my ten-hour sleep. now, i sleep like 6 hours daily. result? i have panda eyes.
Speaking of panda, i was approached by the representatives from WWF on tuesday in MV. I was there with a friend who wanted to pick up lenses. I was already not in a good state on that day and the pouring rain didn't help. it was already 9pm and i oh-so wish to get sugar high that day that i don't see the point of stopping for two-minutes to hear about WWF. i even offered my card for her to give a call because i was rushing at that time. maybe she didn't realize that i looked bored and sumpah-penat-gile-lps-balik-keje. i refused to stop and now i'm said to be panda-hater. whatever panda-lover. you are killing the bamboos by purchasing bamboo-based socks.
zill said that i'm anthony bourdain in the blog and can be jerry seinfield when i talk to someone one-on-one. well, it's an honour because i like anthony bourdain. ok fine, i'm weird.
az-u-rin was asking when is the next road-trip going to happen. i can't wait, really. destination? i have no idea. and we have like two weeks to plan. this saturday has been totally ruled out. it's valentine's day and it is going to be packed. no, i have nothing against it because i'm committed to being single. it's just that it would be a mad rush out there. and going on a road trip on sunday may not be a good idea because energy recharging time for monday's blue may not be sufficient.
so, i don't know babes. suggest a time and i will free my schedule. for both of you, anything i will.
other than that, again, life has its own miracles. my heart is still in penang with the small boy but i think it will get better over time. other than that, i'm just going with the flow. what's the point of agonizing over things you can't control when the thing you should be controlling is yourself?
reading: angels and demons (for the preparation of the coming soon movie)
it's either i have been awfully busy or awfully lazy to type something this whole time. i don't know which but it doesn't matter. life's good, missing SOPOP like nobody's business. I haven't seen Zill for two weeks and it feels like losing an arm. And I haven't talked to si comel yg mempunyai toshi for like two weeks and i'm losing my ten-hour sleep. now, i sleep like 6 hours daily. result? i have panda eyes.
Speaking of panda, i was approached by the representatives from WWF on tuesday in MV. I was there with a friend who wanted to pick up lenses. I was already not in a good state on that day and the pouring rain didn't help. it was already 9pm and i oh-so wish to get sugar high that day that i don't see the point of stopping for two-minutes to hear about WWF. i even offered my card for her to give a call because i was rushing at that time. maybe she didn't realize that i looked bored and sumpah-penat-gile-lps-balik-keje. i refused to stop and now i'm said to be panda-hater. whatever panda-lover. you are killing the bamboos by purchasing bamboo-based socks.
zill said that i'm anthony bourdain in the blog and can be jerry seinfield when i talk to someone one-on-one. well, it's an honour because i like anthony bourdain. ok fine, i'm weird.
az-u-rin was asking when is the next road-trip going to happen. i can't wait, really. destination? i have no idea. and we have like two weeks to plan. this saturday has been totally ruled out. it's valentine's day and it is going to be packed. no, i have nothing against it because i'm committed to being single. it's just that it would be a mad rush out there. and going on a road trip on sunday may not be a good idea because energy recharging time for monday's blue may not be sufficient.
so, i don't know babes. suggest a time and i will free my schedule. for both of you, anything i will.
other than that, again, life has its own miracles. my heart is still in penang with the small boy but i think it will get better over time. other than that, i'm just going with the flow. what's the point of agonizing over things you can't control when the thing you should be controlling is yourself?
reading: angels and demons (for the preparation of the coming soon movie)
Saturday, February 07, 2009
i'm finally up, like really seriously up
i slept like two hours in the train (note to self: next time try to get the one with bed) and had to wait at the train station like an hour
charming and fun (and that's sarcasm)
but the idea of getting out of KL excites me so much so that i did like quite a number of mistakes
i typed railway construction instead of road (org tau la kan ko naik ketapi)
and exactly on this date a lot of people called and some wanted to meet
the time when i forgot to bring my charger here
darn it
but one thing that strikes me the most is the fact that i'm still an impulsive person who does the thing that pops onto her mind instantly
the one who'll wake up and decide 'i want to be in seremban today)
it was kind of cool and creepy in a way
speaking of creepy
i think i've found my twin
like we believe in the same philosophy
our moles are nearly the same
it's almost frightening
ok i'm babbling
my cousin wants to walk around the village
not that i don't want to but its 2pm
panas weih
so, i need to get my ass off this table (thanks cousin for the internet)
i think i should search for food
so long people
have a happy weekend
i know i will
my mom and i are rating and commenting on the ghost story on Astro
i slept like two hours in the train (note to self: next time try to get the one with bed) and had to wait at the train station like an hour
charming and fun (and that's sarcasm)
but the idea of getting out of KL excites me so much so that i did like quite a number of mistakes
i typed railway construction instead of road (org tau la kan ko naik ketapi)
and exactly on this date a lot of people called and some wanted to meet
the time when i forgot to bring my charger here
darn it
but one thing that strikes me the most is the fact that i'm still an impulsive person who does the thing that pops onto her mind instantly
the one who'll wake up and decide 'i want to be in seremban today)
it was kind of cool and creepy in a way
speaking of creepy
i think i've found my twin
like we believe in the same philosophy
our moles are nearly the same
it's almost frightening
ok i'm babbling
my cousin wants to walk around the village
not that i don't want to but its 2pm
panas weih
so, i need to get my ass off this table (thanks cousin for the internet)
i think i should search for food
so long people
have a happy weekend
i know i will
my mom and i are rating and commenting on the ghost story on Astro
Sunday, January 25, 2009
it almost felt like a sickness and addiction mixed in one concoction
and the feelings come in rushes that it became unstoppable and left me bewildered
darn it
life can be fun and thrilling
it also can be near killing
but i thank God for this
because it will eventually make me be stronger
let's keep our hopes high
and the feelings come in rushes that it became unstoppable and left me bewildered
darn it
life can be fun and thrilling
it also can be near killing
but i thank God for this
because it will eventually make me be stronger
let's keep our hopes high
Saturday, January 24, 2009
my throat is papery
due to the ice-blended drink race
i had brain freeze
it was good clean fun
i can't remember the last time i hang out with the younger ones
ok, i know that i do sound like i'm 48 now but in all honesty
it was really good fun
i'm still an insomniac
i hate this
it has nearly been more than two weeks
this shouldn't have happened
ok, i just found out that cousin is going for a camp
kem pengakap
i never thot i had that much influence on them when in true reality
they are greatly influenced
ok, got to behave and no hanky-panky
hihihi
ouh
i'm having stomachache
note to self: must not consume too much ice-cream
and must update comrades on news
due to the ice-blended drink race
i had brain freeze
it was good clean fun
i can't remember the last time i hang out with the younger ones
ok, i know that i do sound like i'm 48 now but in all honesty
it was really good fun
i'm still an insomniac
i hate this
it has nearly been more than two weeks
this shouldn't have happened
ok, i just found out that cousin is going for a camp
kem pengakap
i never thot i had that much influence on them when in true reality
they are greatly influenced
ok, got to behave and no hanky-panky
hihihi
ouh
i'm having stomachache
note to self: must not consume too much ice-cream
and must update comrades on news
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
I’m utterly, honestly terrified. I’m stuck with my story and I can’t move anywhere. The deadline is approaching and barring its fangs at me. Those yellow fangs dripping with blood. And yet, I have no idea on what I’m supposed to be doing.
And I have no idea what I should be doing on 31 January 2009. Maybe I should seriously be thinking about migrating for real now. I have no idea whether I should be reading a poetry, a story or just roll up into a ball and cry piteously on the stage. And I don’t know where I should seek help from. This is maddening.
There’s this thump! Thump! Near my ribs too. I’m concerned if my heart is just going to leap out of the ribcage. As if something good will happen but I don’t know what.
Peti ais. This is even harder than having to learn Morse code. Maybe I should come up with my own Morse code because I’ve been browsing my blog and I was unable to understand what I wrote in the past entries. What’s the whole point of writing if I was not able to look back and re-live the terrible doom?
I’m like so scared right now. I really cannot think straight. And I cannot concentrate, can’t find inspiration and so on and so forth. This is so difficult I just feel the need of throwing myself out of the window. Except mine has grills so I won’t be able to do it. Woman, you are rambling.
I should stop before it gets worse/ Fini
And I have no idea what I should be doing on 31 January 2009. Maybe I should seriously be thinking about migrating for real now. I have no idea whether I should be reading a poetry, a story or just roll up into a ball and cry piteously on the stage. And I don’t know where I should seek help from. This is maddening.
There’s this thump! Thump! Near my ribs too. I’m concerned if my heart is just going to leap out of the ribcage. As if something good will happen but I don’t know what.
Peti ais. This is even harder than having to learn Morse code. Maybe I should come up with my own Morse code because I’ve been browsing my blog and I was unable to understand what I wrote in the past entries. What’s the whole point of writing if I was not able to look back and re-live the terrible doom?
I’m like so scared right now. I really cannot think straight. And I cannot concentrate, can’t find inspiration and so on and so forth. This is so difficult I just feel the need of throwing myself out of the window. Except mine has grills so I won’t be able to do it. Woman, you are rambling.
I should stop before it gets worse/ Fini
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Let’s face it. I’m :
1. Not the brain of Malaysia, KL or anywhere on the map. I am thus, not a genius. I ask questions.
2. I’m not a mind reader. Mortal-to-mortal, I have the same limited ability like those of an average person. Not a person with Spidey-vision or Superman’s mind reading ability. If I ask a question, it would really honour me if the person can provide an answer. A black-and-white answer will be great. A ‘depends’ and ‘up to you’ will just make me fume and breathe fire.
3. Fine, I learnt that karma is for real. Silent treatment, please fly out of the window. I do not wish to use it again.
4. My idols range from Anthony Bourdain, Bill Bryson and Meg Cabot. Hence, I do sometimes have the tendency to copy their sarcastic remarks, which most of the time surprise me. If I ask whether you feel offended, it will make my day if you give a straight answer. Not ‘depends’.
5. I’m learning that ignorance is not bliss; it’s a recipe for disaster. I’m trying to learn new things and sometimes, I don’t even know me, let alone you. And I do believe that one of the ways to learn about things is through asking.
6. As a human, I sometimes forgot how to behave. Again, the same rule applies. If I ask, please answer me. And I would prefer an explanation that will really help me not to repeat mistakes. Don’t forget that to err is human (to forgive is absolutely divine)
7. I love sensitive people because they have empathy. They help ignorant people like me to notice little tiny, gritty, petty looking matters that can be amended and make someone’s day. It will be even nicer if the person don’t sulk on a … say, monthly or weekly basis. It drives me crazy and I feel somewhat like Ariel Sharon when they sulk. Never mind that Ariel Sharon might not even think he’s bad. I just feel like a bad person.
8. I don’t know how to pujuk others. As a friend nicely puts it, ‘ko pujuk orang macam ayam’.
9. I don’t read between the lines. I don’t even know how. I secretly think that my best friend is my personal secretary for reading the lines thingy. It will take me months, even years to realize what happened or was happening. Although you think I posed a question because I was trying to be cheeky and have just read between the lines; here’s news: I ask because I genuinely do not know what it means. And I’m always up for an explanation because I know things happen for a reason.
10. I communicate through words, understand things through words and analyze things through words. If you don’t supply this medium, don’t expect me to understand you immediately. I’m a bad bad judge of expressions.
1. Not the brain of Malaysia, KL or anywhere on the map. I am thus, not a genius. I ask questions.
2. I’m not a mind reader. Mortal-to-mortal, I have the same limited ability like those of an average person. Not a person with Spidey-vision or Superman’s mind reading ability. If I ask a question, it would really honour me if the person can provide an answer. A black-and-white answer will be great. A ‘depends’ and ‘up to you’ will just make me fume and breathe fire.
3. Fine, I learnt that karma is for real. Silent treatment, please fly out of the window. I do not wish to use it again.
4. My idols range from Anthony Bourdain, Bill Bryson and Meg Cabot. Hence, I do sometimes have the tendency to copy their sarcastic remarks, which most of the time surprise me. If I ask whether you feel offended, it will make my day if you give a straight answer. Not ‘depends’.
5. I’m learning that ignorance is not bliss; it’s a recipe for disaster. I’m trying to learn new things and sometimes, I don’t even know me, let alone you. And I do believe that one of the ways to learn about things is through asking.
6. As a human, I sometimes forgot how to behave. Again, the same rule applies. If I ask, please answer me. And I would prefer an explanation that will really help me not to repeat mistakes. Don’t forget that to err is human (to forgive is absolutely divine)
7. I love sensitive people because they have empathy. They help ignorant people like me to notice little tiny, gritty, petty looking matters that can be amended and make someone’s day. It will be even nicer if the person don’t sulk on a … say, monthly or weekly basis. It drives me crazy and I feel somewhat like Ariel Sharon when they sulk. Never mind that Ariel Sharon might not even think he’s bad. I just feel like a bad person.
8. I don’t know how to pujuk others. As a friend nicely puts it, ‘ko pujuk orang macam ayam’.
9. I don’t read between the lines. I don’t even know how. I secretly think that my best friend is my personal secretary for reading the lines thingy. It will take me months, even years to realize what happened or was happening. Although you think I posed a question because I was trying to be cheeky and have just read between the lines; here’s news: I ask because I genuinely do not know what it means. And I’m always up for an explanation because I know things happen for a reason.
10. I communicate through words, understand things through words and analyze things through words. If you don’t supply this medium, don’t expect me to understand you immediately. I’m a bad bad judge of expressions.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)