How to Include A Baby into Your Exercise Routine

saya kuat kan?
Originally uploaded by uculer

Disclaimer: Readers are reminded that you need to have enough sense of humour to digest this. Anyone who does not think throwing up a baby in the air until the baby throws up is funny should not proceed beyond this point. Yes, here. You can stop now before you are emotionally-scarred. For life. Gosh, you are still here? Ok fine, you have been warned.

I have been really busy lately. I try to go to the office as soon as I can, rising as early as 6 am so that I can leave the office before 5pm. And all of this is because of my nephew called Imran. Or bayi pipi tak berapa nak labuh. Or budak busuk.

Lately, I have also noticed that the expansion near the waist area has been showing great improvement. However, this is of course not something someone with a pear-shaped body should rejoice because further expansion could lead to:
a) inability to squeeze in into an elevator
b) not being able to fit under the armpits of people in the monorail coach (I’m so good at this that I resort to walking from Bukit Bintang to Central Market after office hours or suffer the consequences of inhaling ‘extra perfume’)
c) will have shop for new clothes

The reason for the expansion is simple; the baby eats and I get hungry. And the time to get hungry is usually late at night. But no fear, I have found a solution to exercise using Imran!

What do I do?
1. Babies tend to play a lot and Imran is no exception. He loves being thrown up in the air so that’s what I do the first thing I reach home. This loosens the stress after eight hours of sitting in the office. After a few throws, you’ll feel much better.
However, if you happen to be over 25, please be prepared for the next day because most of the unwelcome sensation will take place around the waist area.

2. Imran has started walking and thankfully he’s quite tall for his age so I do not have to bend down while guiding him to walk around the house. I usually help him walk around the house a few minutes and I can assure you this is fun because the most adorable smiles come from toothless babies. Imran has six teeth but I just pretend he has none.
3. The next area to work on is the arms. After walking a few minutes, I will carry Imran in my arms so that it will be more balanced. I will carry Imran in both arms so that the 5kgs will be distributed evenly.
4. I have stopped throwing Imran in the air after a few days he arrived at my house. So now I resort to pushing him up in the air while I lay down on the floor with my knees folded to my chest. Great for legs.
5. I consider the last exercise routine as the easiest. I sit down on a chair and put him on my legs. Then I raise my legs, raising it up with him and I swear he loves it or why else should the high-pitched voices keep coming out of his mouth, right?
Wait, that or he was actually screaming for his dear life.

Anyways, too late already.

See? Isn’t it simple? You get to play with the baby AND exercise at the same time.

However, kindly be reminded that the baby should be paid for his or her efforts or else it will be child labour. In my case, I feed Imran with Famous Amos (1 for Imran 3 for me. Yeay!)

So, there you are. I’m just going to lock my door just in case his father tries to strangle me in my sleep. Nanait people!